BF, “I need you to go to Lowe’s for me.”
TMF, “Are you sure you want me to go to Lowe's for you?”
BF, “I’ll give you a list.”
TMF, “Um, okay.”
The list consisted of contractor’s bags, electrical tape and a spigot for an outside leaky pipe. I think Lowe’s employees can spot a helpless shopper from across the store. I hate to call myself a damsel in distress, but I honestly have no idea what I’m looking for.
I wandered around the plumbing department until I found what I think attaches to a garden hose. Then I took a step back. Whoa, too many choices.
Thankfully a Lowe’s employee came to my rescue.
Lowe’s Guy, “What kind of valve do you need?”
TMF, “Uh…Is a valve the same thing as a spigot?”
I can’t imagine what the Lowe’s Guy is thinking in his head,
“Yes ma’am, it is. What size do you need?”
“Yes ma’am, it is. What size do you need?”
TMF, “Um...Can you hold on a second?”
I call BF on his cell phone.
TMF, “What size valve do we need?”
BF, “3/4 inch.”
TMF to Lowe’s Guy, “3/4 inch.”
Lowe’s Guy to TMF, “What material? Brass, bronze, copper, nickel…?
TMF to BF, “What material? Brass, bronze, chrome, nickel…?”
At this point I considered handing my phone to the Lowe’s Guy, but I felt it might have been awkward for both of them. I wonder how many three-way conversations the Lowe’s Guy has experienced.
BF to TMF, “Whichever one is cheapest.”
TMF to Lowe’s Guy, “Whichever one is cheapest.”
Lowe’s Guy to TMF, “Do you want a hand wheel, quarter-turn, T-handle?”
TMF to Lowe’s Guy, “Really?”
TMF to BF, “Do you want a hand wheel, quarter-turn, T-handle?”
BF to TMF, “Whichever one is cheapest.”
TMF to Lowe’s Guy, “Whichever one is cheapest.”
The Lowe's Guy grabs a 3/4 inch brass, t-handle valve from a box directly in front of me. I feel as if I finished a marathon as I make my way to the registers.
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